Social media boundaries while in a relationship
Social media has infiltrated our lives for better and for worse. It’s allowed us to connect, rekindle and peer into the lives of our crushes, partners, family, friends, colleagues, exs, frenemies, celebrities and complete strangers.
But it’s also caused our eyes and minds to question whether the grass is stronger, thinner, happier, sexier or richer on the other side.
Social media etiquette is new to us all. It’s likely something you’ve never considered until you’ve seen your crush or partner like/ comment on a very attractive picture of someone else. *Queue in the intrusive thoughts*: Why did they like this half naked picture? Is this what they’re attracted to? I don’t look like them, is this who they secretly want?
What if the risqué picture wasn’t of a public figure/ mega model? What if it was their ex? What if your partner was posting scandalous pictures of themselves?
Let’s dig into it all— check out the data/ research I gathered from our Instagram community on social media do’s and don’ts while in a relationship.
Is it okay for your partner to like risqué pictures of other people on Instagram?
Based on 310 women and 529 men who voted.
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73% of women believe it’s not okay for their partner to be liking risqué pictures of other people.
27% of women believe it’s okay for their partner to be liking risqué pictures of other people.
62% of men believe it’s okay for their partner to be liking risqué pictures of other people.
38% of men believe it’s not okay for their partner to be liking risqué pictures of other people.
There is a HUGE gap between men and women’s views on this topic. I believe the majority of men said they “don’t care” because they don’t actually see it happening… Men don’t typically post extremely provocative pictures like women do. Men probably don’t even know how or where to look and find their partner liking certain pictures. Call it laziness, trust or ‘ignorance is bliss’, some guys just aren’t interested in adding further stress into their lives by trying to dig up that dirt.
What does it mean when your partner likes someone else’s picture on Instagram?
Throwing a like on a risqué picture of someone is acknowledgment of what you saw and validation that you enjoyed what you saw. Is it not…? Now let’s paint this picture IRL - You see a famous model, friend, an ex or acquaintance out and about. They’re dressed to the nines and looking HOT. Are you going to go out of your way to let them know that right in front of your partner? Probably not, right? That would be quite inappropriate.
Is it okay for your partner to like pictures of their ex(s) on Instagram?
Based on 333 women and 601 men who voted.
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It’s clear that both men and women care more about their partner throwing likes at their ex(s) over liking a model’s picture. Likely because the reality of getting noticed by the model is slim to none.
But liking a picture of an ex… is there more to that “like”? Are they still in touch? Why are they still following their ex?— Do you see what I mean? But it is circumstantial and maybe it’s based on the level of potential threat to your relationship. A fling/ ex of 10 years ago is likely less of a threat than their most recent ex. Here are a few other reasons why someone would get upset by their partner liking pictures of their ex(s).
They are comparing themselves to their partner’s ex/ former relationship
They have boundaries and one of them is respect for your relationship
They think the person their partner threw a like to is a threat to their relationship
They have insecurities stemming from similar past hurts and behaviors
79% of women and 65% of men are not okay with their partner tap dancing around their ex’s social media profiles. Keep that in mind next time you find yourself at this crossroad!
Do you care if your partner posts scandalous pictures of themselves on Instagram?
Based on 300 women and 587 men who voted.
Once again, it’s far more normalized for a girl to take and post scandalous pictures of herself than it is for a guy to do.
If your partner was posting scandalous pictures before you were together or it’s their job (some sort of influencer) then maybe you’re okay with it.
If you’re not okay with it, you can explain that it makes you uncomfortable and you are concerned with the attention posting those kinds of pictures could bring.
The overwhelming majority of women believe it’s wrong for their partner to “like” attractive pictures of other women in general. Instagram is a highly visual app and men are highly visual beings but when it comes to relationship boundaries, the data shows its best to refrain from liking pictures of your ex(s) and people you find attractive.
I hope you found this article insightful. I’ve you’ve enjoyed it, please share it with some friends!
xX,
Stephanie
