Sex Ed for Women

Ladies, welcome back for round 2 😉. If you missed sex tips for women from men part 1, read it here. I’m SO excited to share this exclusive insight with you. As always, leave it to me to be the liaison between the masculine and feminine. The following questions were asked by women and answered by men from our Instagram community.

I absolutely love gathering, refining and delivering this insight but it is A LOT of work. If you find it valuable/ fun, please share it with your friends! People resonating with my work makes allll the hard work worth it :).

Let’s begin!

The one thing men wish women did more of:

Initiating. It makes sense. Just as we love feeling desired by our partner, they want to feel the same thing. I had over 25 men respond to this and the majority of them wished us ladies would take more initiative getting them into the bedroom and take more initiative when we’re in the bedroom. The reason? Because sometimes guys don’t want to do all the work. They want to feel and see your desire for them, just as you want to feel and see theirs towards you.

I know it can be awkward or feel vulnerable when we’re putting ourselves out there like that and making a move, but trust that your initiation will be more than well-received, because it will be. ESPECIALLY if it’s something you don’t usually do. It’s a good way of switching and spicing things up!

Do guys like dirty talk?

Okay, so the girl who asked this question didn’t specify which kind of dirty talk (aggressive/crude vs. words of affirmation) but I am willing to bet monies that the majority of men voting ‘yes’ like words of affirmation in the bedroom.

Just like us women, men LOVE compliments in and out of the bedroom. In the bedroom, it serves as guidance on levels of enjoyment and pleasure. If you’re reassuring them that something feels/looks good, they’re going to want to do more of it.

A guy asked a similar question that ladies answered in the article ‘sex ed for men part 2’. The top two things women wanted to hear in the bedroom were compliments and their name. Trust me, guys are very similar in this aspect. Who doesn’t want to feel sexy, desired and encouraged to explore their sensuality? Give your partner compliments and SAY their name when you want them to do more of something.

Do men prefer women to wear lingerie or to be naked?

Ladies, please do not all of the sudden go out and buy lingerie just because these numbers point to men ‘preferring’ us to wear sexy undergarments. We all know that too much of something gets old. Lingerie also shouldn’t just be for your partners excitement… Lingerie is meant to make US feel confident, sexy and empowered. And honestly, it doesn’t just have to be an ‘in the bedroom’ occasion. When I worked in a corporate setting I would wear lingerie into important meetings. No one but myself would know I was wearing my best lingerie, but it made me feel a little extra confident. Try it ;).

Do guys enjoy foreplay?

Here is what doesn’t line up for me… 94% of men say they genuinely enjoy foreplay but 90% of women say that men aren’t doing enough or ANY foreplay.

Ladies, we are responsible for communicating our needs, desires and sexual satisfaction. If a guy is moving too fast, ask him to slow things down. If a guy is moving too slow, ask or show him how to speed things up. Foreplay is SUCH an essential part of each sexperience. For the majority of women, an orgasm is far more mental than it is purely physical. You and I both know that we need to feel extremely comfortable, desired and encouraged to explore our sensuality with a partner before reaching climax.

Also, 75% of women CANNOT or RARELY experience an orgasm without some sort of clitoral stimulation. Let’s help educate our partner(s) on our sexual well-being/pleasure.

I want to empower you to communicate your needs. If something doesn’t feel right/good, you can playfully guide a man to do something that feels better for you and he’ll love that. When a guy sees or hears a woman in pleasure that he’s giving her, it turns him on even more - it’s a sense of accomplishment for them. Intimacy is meant to be a mutually pleasurable experience. And life is too short for lackluster intimacy. Ask and you shall receive.

Do guys like ass play?

ARE YOU SURPRISED? I WAS. The majority of men (154 out of 305) like a little or a lot of ass play. I have never explored a man’s abyss and have no intentions of doing so anytime soon. Part of me feels slightly guilty because after doing further research, I learned that men actually receive A LOT of pleasure from this area, but like, I just don’t trust that guys have great hygiene down there so… I’m out.

Check out this info I found on Advocate.com:

“The prostate is a g-spot, and it’s located about two inches (depending on your age and your anatomy) inside your ass. It’s roughly the size of a walnut, and it feels really good when pressed or rubbed (by prostate toys, fingers, etc.).” - Alexander Cheves, Writer at Advocate

I felt it necessary to drop this diagram in here because I doubt every girl knows exactly where a man’s prostate gland is (I didn’t!). Brave ladies, if you’re thinking of pleasuring your partner via their P-Spot (lol, is that a thing?), maybe try asking them if they’re open to exploring this sort of pleasure with you… there’s a 51% chance he’s open to it and actually enjoys it.

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Do guys care if women have had a high number of sex partners?

Excuse my language here but WHO and HOW MANY people you are intimate with is nobody’s fcking business but your own. 77 out of 308 men care if a woman has a high body count. Like I get it, men may prefer a partner who hasn’t slept with every other person because they want to feel like they have someone no one else can have… but there are some things you just don’t ask.

I don’t think this is anyone’s business because it’s in the past. If you’re in a partnership, there is no reason to go into the past for something like this, focus on your present and future together.

Oral Sex Preferences

96% of men prefer head over hand jobs. 76% of men prefer more mouth-work over hand-work during head. As we’ve established in sex ed for women part 1, every man is different when it comes to what he likes and what feels best for him. The best way to know what he likes for certain is if you ASK - do you like x or x? It’s as simple as that.

Do men like to cuddle after casual sex?

There’s a caveat here, ladies. I spoke to my closest guy friends about this and asked them if men genuinely like to cuddle after casual sex. They all said yes BUT ONLY IF they like her (to some degree).

There are indeed people who don’t like cuddling, but personally, I wouldn’t be sharing my energy with them. I really enjoy cuddling, but only with people that I actually like (lol). The feeling of being touched and held is so comforting and has been proven to increase our well-being. If you’re hanging and banging a guy who doesn’t like cuddling he either A, doesn’t like you enough to cuddle or B, he’s not a cuddler. Personally, both A and B are deal breakers for me but you get to make up your own decisions on this.

Takeaway:

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Part 2, DONE! The main thing I’d love for you to take away from this is that confidence is attractive. I’m talking about the internal confidence that cannot be boosted by a new Gucci bag or belt. It’s that magnetic essence people exude when they’re unapologetically themselves.

To me, confidence is knowing you are worthy. It’s knowing who you are, what value you bring into a partnership and not worrying about what anyone else thinks.

Because this is a sex-related article, let’s talk about having confidence during a sexperience. A great way to build your confidence in an intimate setting is with yourself first.

Do you know what you like?
Do you know what feels best for you?
What do you need from your partner in order to feel comfortable, confident and desirable?
Are you able to communicate these things to your partner?

When you give your partner guidance on your pleasure it excites them. Knowing exactly what you like and how to get it/ communicate it is sexy.

I hope you enjoyed this series! I highly recommend you check out the Sex Ed part 1 and 2 for men so you can see the votes/responses women gave on the questions men asked!

If you enjoyed this insight and are feeling called to support this blog, sharing my profile & blog is GREATLY appreciated and helps the growth! 🥰

xX Stephanie