My Self-Care Routine: Space
Space. The best way I can describe self care is a form of taking space. I genuinely believe everyone needs time to retreat and release in one way or another. Whether you’re going through a painful chapter or you just need a break… take space. A space where you can chill tf out, put your phone in another room, cry, read, hide, meditate, recharge, binge the latest Netflix series or sometimes just do nothing at all and THAT’S OK. If you scroll through Facebook or Insta, it seems like everyone is relentlessly proving that they’re doing alllll the things and ‘living their best life’… this can either motivate you or discourage you. Believe me, it’s been the latter for me most of the time.
I created so much damn space around me by shedding SO many unhealthy relationships in 2018...
friendships, intimate relationships and work shituationships, I didn’t know what to do with all the space when it presented itself. There were days where it felt like I was doing absolutely nothing and I would stress because ‘I was doing absolutely nothing’. But I was wrong. I needed that space to heal and just be and not do/pretend things were fine. I tended to my emotional wounds, my physical body and my mental state. I was truly my own best friend. I became extremely mindful of who and what made me think/feel positively and negatively. I began saying no to going out as often and honestly stopped responding to people who would trigger negative emotions within me.
Having taken enough space to consider myself an astronaut or #WOKE, I can tell you this— when you have space around you, it allows you to move freely, think freely and have things come to you freely… The space you create allows you to detach yourself from the current situation or emotions and view them from a different perspective. Different perspectives create new paths and solutions.
A lil’ example would be the start of this very blog… I didn’t even know that blogging was something I ever wanted to do. Quite honestly, I was terrified by my own written word. I was even told that I was not a good writer by a former boss. But I always privately took to ‘mood journaling’ if I was in a rut (something I did while ‘taking space’).
I would have never discovered this creativity/passion had I not shed so many old patterns/relationships that were truly no longer serving me and my well-being.
When I stopped engaging in and entertaining old patterns/relationships, new things came through. The time I spent in these patterns/relationships mentally consumed and drained me. My mindset felt defeated, I lost touch with my personal needs, values and doubted my self-worth.
Whether it be new friendships, a new partner, a new job, spiritual growth, awareness and just overall G R O W T H, space from old patterns and relationships allows for all these things to come through.
Looking back on 2018 I could honestly cry out of pride because of where I was at then and where I am at now. Self care isn’t pretty. It’s not essential oils, bath bombs and yoga. It’s looking into past situations, accepting responsibility wherever you can, leaning into the pain and knowing the only way through it is just that, through it. For me, I was able to work on this through creating space.
Space can be:
Breaking off an unhealthy/unfulfilling relationship(s)
Detaching from toxic friendships
Quitting a job
Saying no to things you really don’t want to go to
Creating new boundaries
Think of space as an emotional ‘Spring Cleaning’. You are letting go of the old to make room for the new. Where heavy energy once resided, new things will now come through.
They can be in the form of new passions, a new job opportunity, a worthy partner, etc…
Taking space will be different for everyone, but if you aren’t sure on where to begin, or how to get out of a toxic environment, please message me. Sometimes an unbiased perspective can help you see new paths a bit more clearly.
With s'much love,
