Will They Lose Interest If You Put Out Too Early?
Dear Ladies (and gents),
The answer to this question is a bit more complicated than what the stats are showing… there are buckets and scales involved, let’s continue.
I’ve talked to 20+ guys about this very topic. Some of them said they wouldn’t take someone seriously who puts out on the first date because, and I quote, “If they are doing this with me on the first date, I’m wondering how many other guys they are also doing this with." But is a guy really going to deny your supply? Nope. Why? And I quote, again… “because, s*x”. It’s as simple as that.
Some of the other men I spoke with said they put women into “buckets”. Let’s call some of these buckets: Wifey Material, Just for Funsies, Cute but Psycho, Can’t Bring Home to Mama. Yes ladies, we get nicely placed and sometimes tossed into buckets. Now I can’t say that a woman would be tossed into the “Can’t Bring Home to Mama” bucket if she put out on the first date because she might be a super fun and normal gal just living in the moment, and a guy might actually appreciate that. But getting placed in such bucket is typically the case for doing so. Society has shunned this sort of behavior which has inherently been engrained into most-ish men.
So my advice here (as your friend who has had men openly chat about this very topic) is this… don’t open your cookie jar on the first date IF you want to be taken seriously as a potential lover.
The only reason why they would lose interest is one or both reasons:
They don’t want to date someone who puts out on the first date because they believe she is doing that with everyone else and they no longer feel special/ no longer think you’re special.
The supply AKA the s*x wasn’t that good.
Please don’t kill the messenger, that is all that I am. After I casted this vote, I had multiple guys say the same thing:
Like I said, scales. Apparently there is a performance scale. For some reason I imagine it being described as such:
Never Calling You Again - Awkward - Meh - Doable - Good - Amazing - What Are You Doing For The Rest Of Your Life or Like, This Friday at 1AM?.
THE DATA:
The question I asked our Instagram community was: Generally speaking, if a woman puts out on the first date, do you lose interest in her after you seal the deal?
38% of men say they would lose interest if a woman put out on the first date.
62% of men said they would not lose interest.
Ok, so… I feel like I shot myself in the foot after asking this because I believe the majority of the men who answered “no” just want more women to put out on the first date and are trying to normalize it🤣. I’m kiddingg, but that thought certainly crossed my mind.
So there ya have it. The short answer is no but with a caveat. If you’re looking for a realtionship and to be taken seriously as a potential lover, I would advise NOT putting out on the first date. But if you’re just looking to have a little capital-F-fun, do you boo boo. Just remember… buckets and scales.
With love,
